My life in the Circus by Gerry Cottle and Helen Batten
‘Please do not under any circumstances try to find me. I have gone forever. I have joined the circus. You do not understand me. You are not listening to me. I do not need O’ levels where I am going. I am going to join the circus. I have gone.’
So began the cassette tape that Gerry Cottle left his mother when he ran away to join the circus.
The idea for Confessions of a Showman came from a year spent making a TV documentary for BBC2 about Gerry Cottle’s circus. Gerry was a consummate raconteur, full of racy anecdotes behind which was an extraordinary life story. Helen told him he should write his autobiography. One day Gerry rang her and asked if she would write it for him. Confessions of a Showman was published two years later.
It starts with Gerry, a stockbroker’s son from Surrey, literally running away to join the circus when he was sixteen. Bored by his 1950’s suburban grammar school life, a childhood visit to the circus was an epiphany – glamorous women in sparkly costumes, danger and applause, nothing else seemed like living. He tried his hand at all kinds of acts – knife throwing, hire-wire walking, juggling, but Gerry was barely mediocre at all of them – he was once called the worst clown in the world. He decided that the only way he could make a living in the circus was to own one, but British circus was a closed shop to anyone from outside the few traditional circus families.
Gerry realised his only option was to marry into the circus. He fell in love with the beautiful Betty Fossett, a famous bare-back horse rider from Britain’s oldest circus family and set up his own circus with Brian Austen. Master of the publicity stunt, within a few years Gerry had become the most successful circus owner in Britain, running several circuses that toured up and down the country. He was a TV celebrity with his Big Top hosting BBC’s prime time Seaside Special every summer. But as public opinion turned against animals in the circus, Gerry struggled with his addictions to prostitutes and cocaine. His darker moments were as spectacular as his successes.
This is a story of a remarkable character. Gerry was full of life, energy and courage. He always picked himself up after his many calamities, a man who truly struggled and eventually conquered his demons. But it is also the story of a disappearing world – the insular, tight circus community. Packed with irrepressible stories of circus acts gone wrong, girls chased and family feuds, Confessions of a Showman tells the extraordinary story of the ultimate showman.